It can be quite alarming when a woman suddenly has no desire for intimacy. This problem, known as loss of libido, can be caused by many factors such as hormonal changes (perimenopause or menopause), stress, anxiety, and fatigue.
In this blog post, we will explore the causes of loss of libido in women and suggest some ways to correct it.
So, if you are experiencing a lack of interest in sex, read on!
Why have I lost my libido now that I am approaching menopause?
Libido is another name for sex drive, or the desire for intimacy with your partner.
Some women experience a loss of libido as the enter perimenopause or menopause. Hormonal changes can have something to do with that.
The decrease in estrogen that comes with heading into menopause can cause the vaginal lining to become more rigid and dry causing intimacy to be painful or uncomfortable. The other hormone that plays a part in female libido is testosterone.
Yes, women need small amounts of testosterone too. Research has shown that like estrogen, women experience a decrease in testosterone production as they age. This decrease can lead to less desire to be intimate, and more difficulty becoming aroused.
What is Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder (HSDD)?
HSDD is when you are bothered by not having (or having low) sex drive.
This is a common issue among women in perimenopausal and menopausal age groups.
The best advice here is to talk to your doctor. Here are some of the common symptoms of women who are experiencing HSDD.
- Your lack of desire for intimacy has lasted at least 6 months and it is causing you/your relationship distress.
- You avoid situations that could lead to intimacy.
- Inability to maintain interest during intimacy.
- Lack of desire to initiate intimacy with your partner.
So, talk to your doctor. The good news is that there are treatments and/or medications for this.
How can I correct my loss of libido?
Talk to your doctor about options.
- One option is Bioidentical Hormone Replacement Therapy (BHRT). Your doctor can test your hormone levels and then give you estrogen and testosterone as needed to help bring your body back into a balance that is closer to what you had prior to perimenopause and menopause.
- There are also prescription medications available to help with sex drive. Two of the more common ones are Vyleesi and Addyi.
- For women who are having difficulty with arousal, there are creams that can be applied directly to the local area to help increase blood flow.
- For those with dryness issues, there are creams that can be applied internally to help plump the tissues and make intimacy comfortable again.
- The other common issues that can accompany loss of libido are stress, anxiety, and fatigue. Look for ways to de-stress so that you can relax and concentrate on your partner. Exercise, reading, meditation, yoga, and other activities may help you deal with stress.
- Anxiety is a common issue too. Whether you are worrying about finances, relationships, weight gain, children or grandchildren, anxiety can also distract you from your partner. Talk to your doctor about your anxiety and what you can do to treat it.
- Fatigue comes with the territory as well. As hormone levels decrease, energy levels can too. The loss of estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone can lead to fatigue. Poor sleep can add to that. Talk to your doctor about testing your hormone levels and possibly starting BHRT. There are also supplements that your doctor can recommend for sleep. Finally, consider getting your thyroid function checked. Your doctor can draw labs and see if you possibly have an underactive thyroid which can cause both fatigue and weight gain.
How do I talk to my partner about these issues?
It can be tough to talk about intimate issues with your partner, but it is important. Here are some tips on how to have that conversation.
- Choose a time when you are both relaxed and not distracted by other things.
- Start the conversation by saying something like, “I need to talk to you about something that’s been on my mind.”
- Chances are your partner already knows that there is something amiss, and will be supportive of you.
If you are still not comfortable talking to your partner, that’s ok. Talk to your doctor or a counselor about your loss of libido.
Remember, you can regain your libido. You are not alone in this. Talk to your doctor about what is going on with you and know that there are treatments available.
You don’t have to suffer in silence. Get help so that you can feel like yourself again and enjoy intimacy with your partner.
If you live in the New Braunfels, Waco, San Antonio, or Boerne, Texas areas, we are available to help you. Call us at 830-627-7979 to schedule an appointment in our newest New Braunfels office.